DanMargarita.com

For those unfamiliar with the concept, every year on February 2, in the town of Punxsutawney, Pa., citizens take a rodent and place him into a hollowed out tree stump. The rodent is then yanked out of the stump, where a gathering of locals watch his actions, and then attempt to make a long-range weather forecast, based on them. Despite the advent of satellite weather technology, the people of Punxsutawney continue to use the groundhog as a weather barometer, however it has been many years since they have attempted to appease the Gods by sacrificing a virgin.

The holiday originated in 19th century Germany where residents would watch a badger or hedgehog to predict their winter forecast. In this instant access, immediate gratification age, one can only sympathize with the 19th century Germans, whose lives were apparently so bleak that tossing a hedgehog out into the snow and watching him was considered a legitimate form of entertainment. It certainly was a less harmful one than some of their 20th century ideas of entertainment, such as, invading Poland.

Over the last 115 years, the groundhog, known as Punxsutawney Phil, is reported to have seen his shadow 101 times. How they can tell whether or not he sees his shadow, or anything else for that matter, is a mystery to me. He could be blind for all they know. With all the TV lights around, he's bound to cast a shadow, so there's a great possibility that he'll see it.

There's someone who has been forgotten in all of this, however. They say that behind every great man is a woman, and Punxsutawney Phil is no exception. That's why now I'd like to present a brief profile for you of "Punxsutawney Phyllis: The Woman Behind the Man."

Wait, that's not right. Man and woman would indicate human beings, as rooster and hen would indicate fowl. I don't know what the proper terminology is for groundhogs. Ah, the hell with it.

Phyllis met her husband in 1988, just after her divorce from her previous husband, who ironically, was also named Phil. She became a leader in the women's movement in the 1970's when she, along with noted feminist Camille Paglia, called on the Punxsutawney Town Fathers to include women in the all-male bastion of weather prediction. She filed a lawsuit, arguing that even hurricanes were being assigned female names, and that it was discriminatory under the 1964 Civil Rights Act to exclude females, not to mention males who weren?t named Phil. The case dragged through the courts for years before the Supreme Court finally agreed to hear it in 1997. She lost on a 5-4 decision with Justice Clarence Thomas writing, "Scalia told me to vote against it."

According to the citizens of Punxsutawney, Pa., Phil says that there will be six more weeks of winter. My calendar says that spring will arrive on March 21st, almost seven weeks from Phil's prediction. So who am I to argue with an expert?