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An older gentleman several rows in front of us, apparently tired of their razzing of the home Phillies, eventually turns around and says "They say you're allowed to make a fool of yourself once a day. You're over your limit." Naturally this only encourages them to be even louder, and direct a few of their barbs at him. Even a few of the older folks sitting behind us tell the old guy to "lighten up." It's a long game featuring thirty-five hits, and the Tigers win 15-8.

Next we drive to Tampa where the Yankees are hosting the Cincinnati Reds. Despite having the largest spring training ballpark in Florida (10,000 capacity), many of these seats are held by season ticket holders. The fact that it is the only night game, and superstar Ken Griffey Jr. is playing, means that this is a tough ticket to get. They are sold out and we spread out in search of tickets and as it gets close to game time it looks like for the first time in my tenure that we'll be denied tickets. I finally come across with a ticket but the others are shut out. Eventually we all wind up with a ticket, in fact one too many, which we wind up selling. Had we been able to buy tickets in advance, we likely would've wound up in the far reaches of the ballpark, but our hunt has led us to great (albeit separate) lower box seats.

Britt, who has brought his video camera to tape the trip for his cable TV show Static Attic is told by security that he can't bring his camera bag into the ballpark. His camera is no problem, just the bag which he winds up hiding in the bushes.

Wed., Mar 20---We arrive late to Al Lang Stadium, spring home of the Tampa Bay Devil Rays, who are taking on the Red Sox. Throughout the trip I have managed to acquire press credentials for Britt and myself. Because we are late, the person in charge of media relations, Carmen Molina is nowhere to be found. We wait while they search for her, and eventually they bring us up through the press box and give us seats next to it and we're told that Carmen will be along shortly with press passes. An inning later we are still waiting and both desperately have to go to the bathroom, and are hoping to use the press box men's room which tends to be cleaner than the ones for the general public. Our heads constantly pan back and forth from the game to the press box door as we are "Waiting for Carmen" who never shows. Finally we take turns making are way into the press box without hassle. The Red Sox win 4-1.

For the night game we go back to the Yankees Legend's Field, since we'd been able to get tickets the night before. On my first trip here a few years ago, a beer vendor shorted me $1, and tried again a second time. This time a beer vendor twice tries to over charge me for a non-alcoholic beer, but I'll give her the benefit of the doubt that it was an accident. We have good seats about seven rows behind home plate on the Yankees side. In the first row two very attractive young ladies are sitting in the first row and one has a camera and tries to take a photo of Derek Jeter who stands right in front of her while awaiting his turn to bat. Jeter teases her, refusing to look in her direction when asked, but giving a couple of quick glances when he knows she isn't ready to take a photo. After the game I notice a ball boy bring the ladies two baseballs, presumably autographed by Derek Jeter. After the game we are treated to fireworks, then rudely hustled out of the ballpark in typical New York (south) fashion.

Thurs., Mar. 21---We drive to Bradenton where the Pittsburgh Pirates host the Phillies. It's a nice old ballpark, but the only seats available are bleacher seats down the right field line. They are metal benches with no backs and get uncomfortable after a while. The Pirates win 5-4.

We hit the highway just in time for a driving rain storm and head for Haines City to watch the K.C. Royals host the Yankees. Fortunately it stops raining after a few minutes, but unfortunately it starts again as we make our way from the car to the ballpark. I get in before Britt, pick up my press pass and for laughs decide to make my first stop the Yankees clubhouse. The first person I see is Yankee coach and former Red Sox manager Don Zimmer. I'm tempted to ask him why the hell he didn't reinsert Bill Lee into the starting rotation when the first place Sox began crumbling in '78, but I figure that the man has suffered enough at the hands of Boston sports writers. Next I pop into the media hospitality suite where the Royals have put on the best spread yet. Britt eventually joins me and as I wait for him to finish his meal, the room empties when it's close to game time. We find ourselves alone in the room with Hall-of-Famer Reggie Jackson, who asks where I got my bottle of water. I tell him, and then get him one since he is still eating, and he thanks me and asks my name and what paper I'm from. I tell him and then his cell phone, which is in his hat, on my table, rings. I hand it to him and he says, "I better not answer it. It's probably George (Steinbrenner)."

I ask if he's avoiding the boss, and he replies "He's crazy. He's f@#*^G crazy!"