DanMargarita.com

Often described in the media as “ the domestic diva,” Stewart has been in hot water for some time for selling 4000 shares on ImClone stock that investigators question as to whether or not was a matter of insider trading.

The fact that she sold her shares the day before the FDA denied ImClone’s bid to sell an anti-cancer drug, showed either some foreknowledge of the decision or uncanny instincts which might be well served at the race track.

Stewart began her career by publishing a book Entertaining and subsequently building an empire with a magazine and TV show, all giving tips on home making featuring creative use of household items, making her the “McGuyver” of domestic engineering. In fact her doormat boot scraper is probably the most ingenious use of a coconut since the Professor on Gilligan’s Island made a radio out of one.

Shares of her own company have dropped in price since the scandal began, but not to the degree that ImClone’s stock have. ImClone shareholder’s may want stay tuned to Martha’s website to see if she eventually gives some handy tips on how to make winterized shelter out of worthless ImClone stock.

I’ve taken the liberty of visiting Ms. Stewart’s website and found it to be most helpful. Currently it offers such useful advice as how to make a grilled cheese sandwich (no joke). I plan to check this site regularly because I can’t wait for her tips on how to make ice cubes.

Congress has asked Ms. Stewart to appear before them, but she has refused. Although Ms. Stewart probably fears that Congress will ask about her involvement with the ImClone scandal, sources say that the Congressmen merely want to ask her if it’s improper to send embossed mash notes to the intern that you’re having an affair with.

One of the categories on her web page is “Weddings 101” which has sub-categories such as:

The Ceremony

The Reception

Invitation & Printed Materials

Hiring Vendors.

Unfortunately Ms. Stewart, who is divorced, hasn’t bothered to share her experience in that area. I imagine that some of the sub-categories for “Divorce 101” would be:

The Acrimony

The Blaming

Putting the Kids in the Middle

Hiring an Attorney

The fact is that Martha Stewart is a billionaire who may get a little scarred, but in the long run she’ll be OK. She’s not going to wind up on the side of a bridge like Jimmy Stewart in It’s a Wonderful Life.

Although from what you hear it’s not too hard to imagine her berating her account like Jimmy Stewart’s George Bailey character berated Uncle Billy.

“Where’s that money you silly, stupid fool. Can’t you see what this means? This means bankruptcy, scandal! One of us is going to jail, and it’s not going to be me!”

Judging by the tenacity that the folks on Capitol Hill seem to be going after Ms. Stewart, the next installation in her empire may be Martha Stewart Serving.