DanMargarita.com

This follows a pattern of harassment of Hollywood stars. Many of you might recall the story of actor Hugh Grant, who in a desire for companionship, offered $50 to a lady he met on the street for an evening of friendship.

Grant was then the subject of much needling with some people questioning why a rich, famous, good looking movie star would opt for such company when he had Elizabeth Hurley waiting for him at home. For all we know, Elizabeth might be an example of a great make up job. Without the proper mascara, rouge and lipstick, she may look like a $50 street hooker. Grant was promoting his movie Nine Months at the time, and eventually was put on probation for twenty four months. There was no word on whether he had to attend "Four Weddings and a VD Clinic."

Ryder was arrested for allegedly shoplifting more than $5,500 worth of goods at Saks Fifth Avenue in Beverly Hills. Ryder claimed that she was merely doing research for a movie in which she would be playing a shoplifter. Ryder is a "method actor" so it is quite possible that she needed to experience the realism of a shop lifter, much the same way that John Allen Muhammad and John Lee Malvo, the alleged Maryland snipers, may have just been doing research on what it's like to be a serial killer.

If convicted, it will be imperative to call out the big guns. Bob Dylan will have to write a protest song, as he did for accused murderer, boxer Rubin "Hurricane" Carter.

I think it would probably go something like this:

This is the story of Winona Ryder
the girl the authorities put in stir
For something that she never done
put in a prison cell but one time
She could've won an Academy Award

Eddie Murphy received some notoriety when he was pulled over with a transvestite male hooker in his car. He was let go as he simply explained to the police that he was being a Good Samaritan, giving the individual a ride home. Haven't all of us given a ride to a male transvestite hooker at 4:45 am?

The sad tale of this Girl, Interrupted (while shoplifting) illustrates how Hollywood celebrities have become easy prey for law enforcement, who find defenseless movie stars as accessible targets to advance their political careers.

This persecution must end now, or Ms. Ryder will soon be spending time in prison, perhaps a small prison filled with Little Women or an underwater prison filled with Mermaids.

Like Papillon, she might wind up in a squalid cell forced to drink Beetlejuice to survive, but won't be likely to be exclaiming "Great Balls of Fire!" which was more of a problem for Hugh Grant.

If Ms. Ryder learns one thing from all of this, it's that Reality Bites.