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This is not the pop singer’s first foray into the literary world. You may recall that in the early ‘90’s she published a book titled “Sex.” You can probably guess that it wasn’t about genetics.

The book featured an explicit discussion of the subject as well as nude photos of Madonna, including one where she hitchhikes naked on the side of a highway in L.A. Perhaps the saddest part for Madonna was that no one stopped to give her a lift. Maybe that’s a commentary on L.A. because I would imagine that in most cities in the country a naked female hitchhiker would probably be offered a ride from somebody.

Early on the singer garnered attention by appearing scantily clad in many of her videos. Then with her book she bared it all. At that point there was nothing left for the public to see except for her internal organs.

Trying to imagine if Madonna had written some of the classic children’s books that we all grew up with, I think “Fun with Dick and Jane,” “Hop on Pop” and “The Giving Tree” would have entirely different meanings.

Considering her previous literary effort, it’s a little tough to picture Madonna writing a children’s book. Of course if everyone tried to go top the other end of the literary spectrum it would make for some interesting reading. How about Dr. Seuss writing a Madonna type book? Can’t you just imagine the late Theodore Geissel, a.k.a. Dr. Seuss standing next to a highway hitchhiking, wearing nothing but that red and white striped stovepipe hat?

Reports are that she’s been trying to tone down her image now that she’s got two children, including a son named Rocco that she had with her husband Guy Ritchie (Rocco Ritchie?). She’s probably a very good mother and probably won’t be dangling her kids over a balcony like Michael Jackson.

So I couldn’t help but wonder what Madonna’s children’s book would be like if it were written in the style of Dr. Seuss.

“Getting Nude with a Dude”
By Madonna

I love to be nude
when I’m with a dude
It’s better than food

I don’t mean to be rude
or crude, or even lewd
I just love to be nude

Some think that I’ve had sex that’s gay
or slept with half the NBA
It doesn’t matter who I’ve wooed
as long as I can just get nude

I’ve had so many darn requests
to show the country both my breasts
I guess they know my attitude
that I’m so happy when I’m nude!

I think my talk of being nude
is just so worn out and well chewed
I like this rhyme but must now shake it
there’s no one word that rhymes with ‘naked’

Madonna could’ve succeeded on her musical talent alone, but posing nude definitely boosted her career. In this country it seems that if one is willing to pose nude or have an affair with someone famous, it will lead to increased celebrity. Now it also makes one an author.