DanMargarita.com

Last week it was reported by the Associated Press that toy maker Mattel had decided that after 43 years Barbie and Ken are splitting up. Russell Arons, a vice president of marketing for Mattel and self-described "business manager" of the couple (no joke) said that Barbie and Ken "feel it's time to spend some quality time---apart." Mr. Arons then cut the interview short to go play Cowboys and Indians (joke).

The doll was "born" Barbie Millicent Roberts in 1959 and according to Arons it was on the set of a TV commercial in 1961 that Ken first met the anatomically advanced two-year-old Barbie.

Arons hinted that the separation may be partly due to Ken's reluctance to get married, which has raised some eyebrows. There have long been rumors about Ken's sexual orientation. He could often be seen summering in Provincetown and his proclivity for leather and gold chains to some represented his alternative lifestyle.

The timing of this announcement only adds to the speculation since it comes on the heels of the Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court decision that not allowing gays and lesbians to marry violates the state's constitution. Now Ken can come to Massachusetts and marry anyone he chooses to.

No doubt some will some will not accept this explanation for the split. They may cite Barbie's lack of job stability as a factor in the break up. She's had a varied work life going from Fashion Barbie to Nurse Barbie to Astronaut Barbie to Medic Barbie to Rock Star Barbie to Dr. Barbie (I looked it up on the internet, OK?). If the she doesn't get some stability in her life, she may wind up as "Dying Alone Barbie."

"Like other celebrity couples, their Hollywood romance has come to an end" Arons told the AP, noting Ben and J. Lo and could have added Brittany Spears and what's-his-name to the list.

The Massachusetts Legislature convened to try to craft a bill banning gay marriage but allowing civil unions, but the bid was unsuccessful. Perhaps they should ban celebrity marriages instead.

The term "civil union" almost seems to be an oxymoron considering the divorce rate today. As I heard one married man say regarding the possibility of gay marriage "Why shouldn't they be as miserable as the rest of us?"

Besides becoming the only state in America to allow gay marriages, Massachusetts could also be in the odd position of being the only state where a man and a woman getting married would be considered a "mixed marriage."

As far as I'm concerned, if Ken wants to marry guys or dolls, that's his business and it's a business that Mattel is missing out on. Think of the money they could make with "Gay Groom Ken."

The parting of Barbie and Ken was at least amicable. Fortunately there were no kids involved (since neither were anatomically correct...I assume) and according to Mr. Arons, Barbie and Ken "will remain friends."

Here's hoping that Mr. Arons spends less time with the dolls.