DanMargarita.com

The TV coverage for these horse racing events tends be several hours of profiles and over-analysis followed by the two-minute race. The particularly disturbing aspect of this coverage is the attribution of human qualities to the horses.

"That horse has a lot of heart"

Yes, big enough to feed a family of four in some cultures.

I've had several dogs over the years so I know that animals have their own personalities, but a "winning attitude" is not a quality that I think an animal can possess. Other than Mr. Ed, most horses probably don't have an ego. If they did, there'd be no reason for the jockey to whip them on the ass.

Here's a newsflash for you: if you chase me around with a riding crop and keep smacking me on the tush, I'll run faster too.

I know I'll probably never get to a Triple Crown event so I got as close as thought I could by watching the movie "Seabiscuit."

The movie is based on the best-selling book by Laura Hillenbrand, a remarkable woman who was able to write an epic despite being afflicted with a debilitating case of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Like I needed a reason to feel even more guilty about lying in bed watching reruns of "The Munsters" instead of sitting at my computer writing.

Yes, I could have read the book but let's face it, watching a movie is quicker.

The story of Seabiscuit, his jockey, trainer and owner is indeed an inspiring one. The film depicts them all as underdogs with Seabiscuit being the glue that held a nation together before becoming glue. As you probably know, during Seabiscuit's time the country was mired in the Great Depression and according to the film, the story of this underdog horse (isn't that an oxymoron?) made people feel better about themselves. Perhaps they just felt better that they didn't have to sleep standing up or spend the day in a small room surrounded by their own excrement.

I have no doubt that Seabiscuit was extremely popular in his time by the fact that The Three Stooges parodied him in a movie with a horse named "Teabiscuit." Perhaps that means that Adam Sandler will be doing a parody of Smarty Jones called "Smarty Pants."

I don't want to spoil the movie for you, but the butler did it. Kidding.

There's a scene where Seabiscuit's jockey tells another jockey that all Seabiscuit has to do is get a good look at his opponent and he'll want to beat him. They make no mention if the other horse owed Seabuscuit money.

Dogs are raced as well, but we don't hear about dogs wanting to win. Perhaps that's because without a rider, their goal seems to be to catch that rabbit that always managed to elude them.

Yet, a few years ago ESPN listed its top 100 North American Athletes of the 20th century and to my chagrin listed two horses, Secretariat and Man O' War, at 35 and 84 respectively.

If they're such great athletes, let's see them play another sport like Bo Jackson did.