DanMargarita.com

I’m sorry that the woman is dead and I don’t mean to sound insensitive, but let’s face it…she was boinking anyone and everyone. If all these men are claiming paternity, then they are also admitting to having had unprotected sex with her. Furthermore, she seems to have possibly also been an IV drug user, which would put her in another high-risk group, and I don’t mean a risk of heart disease.

The latest entrant in the paternity race is Prince Frederick von Anhalt, the husband of 90-year old actress Zsa Zsa Gabor. Born the son of a German policeman, he allegedly bought his royal title after being adopted as an adult by a bankrupt daughter-in-law of the last Kaiser. I couldn’t make that up if I tried.

It would almost sound comical for von Anhalt to make this paternity claim, but then we must remember that Smith became famous for marrying an 89-year old multi-millionaire, J. Howard Marshall II when she was 26-years old. If they consummated that marriage, I’d have to say she was entitled to at least some of his estate. I mean, c’mon, would you do that if not for the money?

"It could be 20 men who are the father," the ever-gallant and respectful von Anhalt told FOX News (yes, I’m quoting FOX News on that). "I liked her a lot ... she was a hot girl. If I had sex with her I don't talk about it (except at press conferences, apparently) ... I'm a married man" continued the highly-scrupled von Anhalt.

Gabor, some 30 years older than von Anhalt, has been married to the “prince” for 20 years. Perhaps he felt the need for relations with someone younger, but the age difference didn’t seem to deter Smith in her marriage to Marshall.

"She was a very big fan of Zsa Zsa and wanted to be like Zsa Zsa," von Anhalt said, adding "She wanted to be a princess." I have to admit, I never thought of Zsa Zsa Gabor as a princess. She wasn’t even the one on Green Acres.

Unwilling to ask Gabor for a divorce, von Anhalt said he considered adopting Smith and even filled out adoption papers. Strangely enough, Gabor refused to sign the papers that would let her husband adopt a former Playboy Playmate. What man hasn’t considered adopting a Playboy Playmate at some point?

Von Anhalt said that he believes Gabor knew about the affair, sometimes answering the phone when Smith called, but that she never let on.

"The next morning my wife would always ask 'Who are you talking to?"' he said. "'Oh Europe.' I always said it was Europe."

Apparently, over the course of ten years von Anhalt did more exploring of Europe than Adolf Hitler (Ba-da-boom!).

The circus atmosphere of the recent hearing to determine where Smith would be buried was largely due to the antics of Judge Larry Seidlin, who is rumored to be coveting a reality TV show. He made the proceedings into a reality TV show and acted more like The Fourth Stooge than a distinguished judge. The former Bronx cab driver told personal stories, sobbed openly and called the lawyers by various nicknames such as “Texas,” “California” and “Mama.” He didn’t always use nicknames, sometimes referring to Dannielynne Smith’s court-appointed lawyer Richard Milstein simply as “Milstein.”

The one name he didn’t have for anyone was “Daddy.”