DanMargarita.com

Southwest Airlines doesn’t charge for checking luggage, but they seem to have invested in hiring comedy writers for their flight attendants.

Mar. 15---That aside, my first game was at Dunedin where the Toronto Blue Jays were hosting the Cincinnati Reds. We sit on the third base and for perhaps the first time ever, I remember to put sun block on to avoid the usual first-day burn. There’s not a lot of legroom, but that’s okay since we essentially have the row to ourselves. That way we don’t have to inconvenience too many people to get in and out. At one point we hear a thud behind us and realize that an elderly gentleman sitting in the last row has fallen over, due to a defective chair. Conveniently, one of the booming businesses in Florida seems to be injury law, judging by the amount of billboards with lawyer ads that abound.

Mar. 16---Again we’re back at Dunedin but the Blue Jays are playing the Red Sox, whose following extend to the Grapefruit League. Parking lots that were charging $10 the day before are now charging $20. We have the exact same seats but since today’s opponent is the Red Sox, the place is packed. Inconveniencing people to go to the concession stand becomes necessary. The Red Sox do their due diligence and we get to see regulars J.D. Drew and Jacoby Ellsbury, along with some top prospects. The Sox still manage to win.

One of the problems of big crowds at a ballgame…it provides more targets for foul balls. Seeing as there tend to be a lot of elderly patrons in Florida, folks who may move a bit slower than they used to, that increases the odds of a fan being hit. No less than two patrons are struck by foul balls, and an EMT attending to one fan is nearly also struck. Later, I’m unable to exit to the concourse as EMT’s are attending to yet a third patron.

The night game is in Bradenton, where the Pirates are hosting the defending American League Champs, the Tampa Bay Rays. It’s a nice old ballpark, although we still don’t have much legroom. A Pirates fan in front of us seems overly disturbed that his team is losing. Considering it’s late in the game, it’s a meaningless exhibition game and his team is now fielding players wearing numbers like “97” and will probably not be seen again this season, his worry seems needless. Then again, if you’re a Pittsburgh Pirates fan, you’ll take any win you can get, even if it’s in Spring Training.

Mar. 17---The day game is in Lakeland, where the Detroit Tigers host the Houston Astros. This place has come a long way since my first trip here. It seemed pretty exotic back then that they sold tuna sandwiches, instead of just hot dogs and pizza. Now they sell a wide variety of foods for just about all palates. Another plus is that it’s the first ballpark on the trip so far with actual legroom.

It’s overcast so sun block seems unnecessary but it turns out that those who say that you need sun block on those days the most, are correct. I wind up getting more of a burn that when it’s actually sunny out.

The night game is in Tampa. That’s where we watch the N.Y. Yankees take on the Pirates. If my late, super-Irish aunt, Ruth McGillicuddy O’Toole Murphy knew that I was spending St. Patrick’s Day at George Steinbrenner Field watching the Yankees, she’d be rolling over in her grave. Perhaps she did know and had something to do with the rain we wind up getting.

Out hotel that night is an old favorite, a Howard Johnson’s located on Dale Mabry Drive. It used to be an old favorite anyway, when there was a Dunkin’ Donuts next door. There’s still the “2001 Nude” club a couple of doors down, though. They’re a friendly bunch, judging by the sign that reads “NUDE GIRLS WELCOME BASEBALL FANS.” Unfortunately, there’s no place to respond with “Baseball fans welcome nude girls.”

Mar. 18---There’s only a day game for us since the only night game is too far away. That day game would be in Clearwater, the spring home of the Philadelphia Phillies. It’s a great new ballpark, highlighted by the tiki bar in left field that remains open after the game, complete with a guitarist-singer. Those familiar with the Fenway Park policy of two beers-per-patron policy, might be thrown by the ability to purchase multiple beers, including a “bucket of beer” for $27.

Mar. 19---The day game is at Port Charlotte, home of the St. Louis Cardinals who face the Rays. Sorry, not much of interest note to report here other than Tampa shortstops making three throwing errors in the game. A good chance for souvenirs…if you’re sitting behind first base.

The night game is in Sarasota, home of the Cincinnati Reds. Well, it’s not their home for long. Next year they’ll be moving their Spring Training facilities to Arizona. What’s even sadder is that any merchandise commemorating their time in Sarasota is long sold out. The good news is that they’re playing the Red Sox. Major League Baseball requires (or at least’s requests) that traveling teams send at least two regular starting players. They figure that if fans are traveling hundreds of miles and spending a ton of dough to see your favorite team, you ought to see at least a couple of players whose name you’ll recognize. As a road game for the Red Sox, the team sends few regulars. Well, one actually and that’s shortstop Jed Lowrie, and he’s a starter mainly because of an injury to probable starting shortstop Julio Lugo.

Mar. 20---The big day, in that we make the ridiculously long drive to Ft. Myers to see the Red Sox play at home. I’ve managed to snag media credentials for this one, but we manage to miss an exit off of the highway and I don’t get there until after the game starts. It becomes a bit of a hassle to get the credentials but it happens, although I later find out it causes some consternation with the Sox press corps.

Mar. 21---Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays are generally day game only days, so our day game is back in Clearwater. The highlight comes after the game when we make our first stop ever at the original Hooters restaurant. I mean…I like baseball…

Mar. 22---The last game for me is back at Lakeland. Not quite as sunny and warm as earlier in the week, but I make every effort to get as much sun as possible so that I can keep my color for as long as possible.

After all, what good is going to Florida in March if you can’t rub it in to your friends?