DanMargarita.com

This past Sunday marked the 11th anniversary of the “No Pants” event, which was originated as a global prank by a group called Improv Everywhere. I’m not familiar with this group, but that fact that they decided to stage this event in January leads me to believe that they come from a warm-weather climate.

Actually, further research indicates that this group originates in New York City. This is a surprise? Could an idea this twisted have possibly come out of Des Moines? I doubt it.

It wouldn’t surprise most people to see one person on a New York subway with no pants on, but most folks would assume that this person merely had his or her pants stolen.

According to news reports, several cities around the globe were scheduled to participate in the event, including London, Mexico City and Washington D.C. Of course, for those of you who have followed the news the past several years, politicians in Washington seem to consider everyday a “no pants” day.

Not sure how well this worked out in Tehran. Perhaps subway riders were asked to lower their burka’s a tad.

Of course, it’s pretty much only major cities that have a subway system, so I’m not sure what people in small towns were supposed to do. Maybe drive to work in their cars with no pants? If they waited until they got to their desk to put their pants on, it might have caused a bit of a sensation at the water cooler.

“About that promotion, sir…”

Of course, one is supposed to be wearing underwear of some sort, although the organizer of one “pants” ride in Vancouver stated, “Thongs are discouraged (unless you’re really hot).”

Next time you’re at work, take a look around and see how many co-workers are really hot. They’re decidedly a minority.

The goal, according to one “no pants” group, is to cause both amusement and chaos amongst the riders of the subway. The “no pantsers” are supposed to take their pants off once they get on the train and stuff them in a backpack, or some equivalent thereof. Left unsaid, but should probably be stated anyway, is to WAIT until you’re actually on the train to take your pants off and not before you leave your apartment, when buying a subway token or when being chased by the police for some other offense you’ve committed.

Indeed members of congress have a long history of being unable to keep their pants on.

(SEE: WEINER, ANTHONY...Uh, THAT IS, FORMER CONGRESSMAN ANTHONY WEINER).

In fact, it wouldn’t surprise me if Daniel Webster on the floor of the U.S. Senate originated the phrase, “keep your pants on.”

(Sorry, but I’ve been watching a lot of The Marx Brothers lately, so I’ve got a Groucho cadence in my head).

Meanwhile, in the Granite State, several Republican hopefuls have trolled through restaurants and diners across the state in order to meet voters and try to secure their support for when they enter the voting booth.

Several candidates have seen their poll numbers rise and fall in this unusual and unpredictable campaign season. Of course the frontrunners wouldn’t want to take any risks of damaging their leads, but perhaps those who have fallen behind should adopt a pants-less campaign. I mean, what have they got to lose…except their pants?

It would certainly create a stir and get them some more publicity, and should they actually wind up getting elected, well, we’ve certainly had our share of pants-less presidents as well as members of congress.

Okay, maybe you don’t want to see Ron Paul without pants on. I’m with you on that one, but I wasn’t planning on voting for him anyway. As a Mormon (Mitt Romney, that is, not me), I suspect he would be at a disadvantage if he were wearing the sacred garments, aka the Mormon Underwear. Thongs, they are most certainly not.

If I were to ever participate in such an event, (and that’s highly unlikely), it would have to be staged during a warmer season. Unless everybody else is doing it, though, it could cause a problem.

Try taking your pants off on the subway on July 12th. See how it works out then.